Smallville – "Icarus"

Director: Mairzee Almas
Writer: Genevieve Sparling

At last we have come to the final season of Smallville and the final appearance of Impulse on the show. (He will show up in the Season 11 comics, and I'm not too excited for that.) And if you thought Impulse's last appearance was brief, just wait until you watch this episode! Or don't. I don't recommend this show. At all. To anyone.

Our story begins with Clark Kent finally proposing to Lois Lane. But this happy event is overshadowed by the government's crackdown against Clark and his super friends. Led by General Slade Wilson, the VRA (Vigilante Registration Agency) has launched Operation: Icarus to round up all known vigilantes. And Wilson actually has done his homework, figuring out the identities of just about every superhero on the show. He's even distributing wanted posters that show the faces of Green Arrow, Aquaman, and Impulse (using a picture of Kyle Gallner from his first appearance on the show). Slade doesn't, however, have a picture of Clark, resorting to his Superman logo and referring to him only as "The Blur."

Anyway, to make a long story short, there's a bunch of interrogation scenes, culminating in Wilson holding Lois in his office at the top of a skyscraper. Hawkman comes crashing through the window at the last second to save her, and after a brief fight, there's a big explosion. Hawkman wraps Lois in his wings as they plummet to the ground.

Clark confronts Wilson on the ground, who tells Clark that Lois and Hawkman died, even though he didn't bother to check. He explains he named the operation Icarus because he thought the superheroes were flying too close to the sun, but now he relishes in the poetic irony of having watched Hawkman's wings literally catch fire. Clark asks how Wilson survived the explosion, and he mysteriously says he's now immune to death's stroke (get it?). In response to this, Clark apparently sends Wilson to the Phantom Zone with a convenient handheld Phantom Zone projector.

Clark then checks on Lois and Hawkman. Turns out, Carter's wings protected Lois, but Carter himself sustained fatal injuries in the fight and ensuing blast. So our episode ends with a funeral for Hawkman in an Egyptian pyramid. Everybody is there ... sort of. About half the heroes, including Impulse, have their hoods on and the camera is careful not to show their faces. Anyway, once Carter is buried next to his wife, a mysterious white pyramid-like object appears and knocks everybody out. What does this mean? Who cares? This show sucks.




According to IMDb, Kyle Gallner did appear in this episode, but was uncredited. I don't know if they're just counting the picture we saw of him, or if he actually was at the funeral, hiding under his old Impulse hood. Considering how out of shape he looked in his last appearance and how little the director was willing to show him, it's not inconceivable that even more extreme measures would be used this time to conceal Gallner. But, I think it's more likely that the roles of Impulse, Aquaman and others were played by extras in this scene. And that just shows the cheapness and lameness of this show. The death of a hero should be a big deal, and a show should be able to arrange for previous guest stars to come back at least for one day of work.

This episode was quite unbearable, especially with this show's pathetic attempt at the Deathstroke character. The Hawkman fight was the only bit of action in the episode and it was rather uninspiring. However, I did have to laugh at how bad our heroes are at protecting their secret identities. I mean, the VRA figured everything out, except for Clark, but even then, they were halfway there. Ultimately, though, I am just very glad that I don't have to endure another episode of this show. I credit them for at least attempting to use the character Impulse. They didn't come anywhere near meeting my expectations, though.

Next time, we'll return to Teen Titans #90.

Teen Titans #89

Bruised Egos

J.T. Krul – Writer
Nicola Scott – Penciller
Doug Hazlewood – Inker
Sal Cipriano – Letterer
Jason Wright – Colorist
Rachel Gluckstern – Editor
Scott & Hazlewood with Wright – Cover
Frank Quitely – Variant Cover

Our cover shows the newest member of our team, the current Robin, Damian Wayne, immediately assuming the role of leader. I like the image of Damian sitting confidently in an overly large chair, and I enjoy the smug smile on his face. But I'm not a fan of how the rest of the Titans' reactions were portrayed. They're just giant, vaguely purple heads floating in the background. And the purple really doesn't work on Beast Boy.

Our variant cover takes that same idea one step further — Robin has now defeated all the Teen Titans. Quitely has a very distinctive style. Sometimes I like it. Sometimes I don't. This is one case where I don't really like. Robin's hair looks weird, and his costume has all sorts of lines on it that don't seem to serve any purpose.

Our story begins with Doctor Caligan taking Barney to a Silicon Valley Tech Expo. Caligan is wearing a normal suit and tie, and Barney has a blue hoodie covering his bald head, but not quite concealing a large red scar on his forehead. Barney complains that his head hurts, but Caligan says he just needs to learn how to use his new skills, and that he's brought him to this expo to serve as a "feast for the mind." Barney walks up to a man giving a robotics presentation and grabs his wrist, saying, "You think you're so smart, don't you? Well, now so am I." The man collapses with a dazed look on his face and begins to drool, while Barney begins to glow with blue energy and take the robot apart piece by piece with telekinesis.

Earlier, in Titans Tower, we pick up with our team's introduction to Damian. Cassie asks if this is all a joke, but Damian says the only joke here is Beast Boy, and he announces his first order as team leader is to kick Beast Boy out. Gar growls that Damian is only a child, and Dick tells him to ignore Damian. But Damian points out that Dick and Tim both led the Teen Titans as Robin, and he believes he's more accomplished than any of them were. Cassie points out there's a difference between leading and fighting, and Beast Boy complains that Damian's only been Robin for about a week.

Rose asks Bart what you call a baby robin, and Bart offers hatchling, fledgling or even simply a chick. Rose likes "chick" the best, which naturally upsets Damian. He leaps over the table toward Rose, saying if Tim was here, he'd demonstrate who is the best Robin. But since he's not, Damian says he'll have to settle with teaching Rose her place. Robin gets in a few hits on Ravager, who responds with a few hits of her own before Superboy finally grabs her wrist and Kid Flash steals Robin's batarang. Dick says this wasn't exactly the "meet and greet" he was hoping for, but he does admit it has gone better than he expected.

Cassie pulls Dick out into the hall and demands to know what he was thinking. Dick says he doesn't want Damian to be team leader, just a welcomed member of the Teen Titans. Cassie complains that he can't just show up unannounced and drop off his dead weight on their doorstep. Dick says Damian's not dead weight, so Cassie calls him a problem child instead. Dick also objects to that term, and talks about how much Damian needs the Titans. His whole life has been nothing but betrayal and manipulation, and he needs to learn to trust people. Cassie then unfairly compares Damian to Tim, but Dick continues to just ask for Cassie to give Damian a chance for his own sake.

This seems to do the trick, and Dick begins to walk away. But Damian chases him out the front door, pointing out the difficult choice he made to turn his back on his family and agree to work at Dick's side. And now he feels like he's being dumped here. Dick explains that this isn't a punishment, but an opportunity to learn how to be a hero. As he leaves, Dick urges Damian to give the Titans a chance. Once he's gone, Ravager pops out of the shadows and mocks Damian for having separation anxiety and tells to try not to wet the bed.

We then cut to Mohenjo-Daro, an archeological dig of the ancient Indus Valley civilization. Vijay and Rani, a husband and wife team, visit the site every year with their teenage daughter, Kiran, and assistant Helen. They've been uncovering some renditions of rakshasas — demons from Hindu lore — that were apparently frightening enough to scare away a few of their fellow scholars. But Kiran boasts of how she's never been afraid of the dark.

The next day at Titans Tower, Gar, Rose and Raven are watching Bart and Conner engage in wild game of ping pong while they discuss their new member. Conner says Tim has told him all about Damian and the chip on his shoulder. Rose says she heard Damian takes after the psychotic Al Ghul side of his family, and Gar points out that's not fair for her to say, considering her father is Deathstroke the Terminator. But Rose insists that she's different because Slade didn't raise her — he only drugged her.

Raven points out that all of them came to the team with their own baggage and says that if Damian is so damaged, then they should try all the harder to help him. Conner doesn't think Damian wants to be helped, and Bart admits he doesn't like seeing him in a Robin's costume, even if Batman vouches for him. Rose asks Conner why Cassie let Damian stay, and Conner says she'll have to ask Cassie herself. Rose is surprised by this, asking, "Don't you guys share like everything?" Conner meekly replies, "Not lately."

Damian, meanwhile, is hanging out with Cassie in the monitor room, as she talk to Dr. Mid-Nite about developing a potential cure for the feral boys. When Cassie's call ends, she asks Damian why he's not hanging out with the rest of the team. Damian says he'd rather review the monitor than waste time playing games. Cassie tries to teach him about the concept of unwinding, but they're interrupted by a news report of the chaos Barney is causing at the tech expo.

Cassie leads Damian to gather up the rest of the team, unfortunately walking in on them right as Rose suggests they tell Cassie they don't want Damian on the team. Damian tells Rose she should be the one to leave, suggesting she join up with her father. Cassie tells both of them to stop, saying she's the leader and she made the decision and they all need to act like a team now. She tells them about the situation at the expo and asks Raven to teleport them there, adding that she hopes Ravager and Robin can fight real threats as well as they fight each other.

When our heroes arrive at the expo, they find the place mostly demolished, with Barney standing triumphantly over a handful of people on the ground. Barney says he must be something right to have attracted the attention of the Teen Titans, and Damian charges ahead, telling his teammates to "tend to the weak." And nobody notices Doctor Caligan coyly hiding in the back.

Damian leaps at Barney, but Barney counters with his telekinesis, throwing the boy high up toward the vaulted glass ceiling. Superboy chases after Damian to prevent him from crashing, while Raven, Wonder Girl and Beast Boy begin escorting bystanders to safety. Beast Boy turns into a pteranodon to  scoop up Caligan and fly him away, not realizing he's the true villain behind this. And Caligan can't prevent himself from commenting aloud how Beast Boy is a "fascinating specimen." Wonder Girl tells Kid Flash to stop Barney before he brings down the whole convention center, and Bart assures her Barney won't get the chance.

Ravager has already begun her attack on Barney, but is slowed up in a field of debris he's tossing at her. Kid Flash easily zips past the debris, prompting Rose to call Bart a show-off. But right before Bart reaches Barney, he pushes both the heroes back with a blast of pure psychic energy. Barney boasts of his great power and the amount of knowledge he drained from various experts at the expo. To demonstrate this, he builds an army of robot spiders from the scraps of metal littering the building. Our team immediately begins battling the robots, and while Cassie is worried about someone being caught alone with these machines, Damian finds the experience quite fun, saying he should have joined them months ago.

Bart also can't hide his enjoyment with this battle and even suggests they try out a new battle cry: "Titans Disassemble!" However, Ravager points out the main problem with this fight — Barney can put the spiders back together as fast as the Titans can destroy them. Finally, Raven makes some actual progress by taking Barney with her to astral plane. She manages to calm him down and speak directly to the emotions he's feeling. But as soon as she brings him back to the real world, Robin attacks Barney, thanking Raven for the distraction.

Raven tries to explain that Barney had given up, but Robin won't hear it. And all his punches did was anger Barney even more than before. He sweeps up the Titans in a huge whirlwind, accusing them of lying and not really caring about him, just like everyone else. Barney then flies away, vowing that they'll all be sorry for mistreating him. Bart tries to help Rose get up on her feet, but she insists she's fine. Superboy chooses to check on Raven and Beast Boy instead of Wonder Girl. Raven laments that this could have been avoided and that she had Barney under control. And our issue ends with everybody angrily glaring at Damian, who stubbornly refuses to understand what he did wrong.




I actually really enjoy Damian Wayne. I think he's a really fun character — all this incredible skill, anger and arrogance used to cover up the fact that he's really just a vulnerable little boy. Unfortunately, Damian's arrival basically killed off the character of Tim Drake, much like Barry Allen's return destroyed Wally West. DC sometimes just doesn't know what to do with all their characters. Since Damian became Robin, Tim couldn't be Robin anymore. But he couldn't be Nightwing, either, so he had to resort to the obnoxiously named Red Robin — something we'll be dealing with for the next couple of years. But even with all that, I am happy Damian's on this team now. He adds just the right amount of tension and humor.

This Barney character is rather interesting. Essentially, he's the exact opposite of the feral boys, which makes me question whether Dr. Caligan has any traditional motives beyond experimentation and creating chaos. Barney's acquisition of technical knowledge also makes me wonder if we'll have any payoff with Bart's scramble to record all his futuristic knowledge. Hopefully the arrival of Damian didn't push that thread to the side.

I am a little surprised that Cassie didn't hold a vote for Damian's inclusion on the team. Are we to believe that the leader of the Teen Titans has absolute, tyrannical power on all matters? A vote really would have gone a long way toward building team unity. We also know that at least Beast Boy objected to the inclusion of Ravager on the team, so things are already a little tense in the tower. And Cassie is just making things worse with this authoritarian stance, not mention constantly pushing Superboy away. But it does seem like we might have one romantic couple on the team before too long. Bart and Rose are starting to hit it off, regardless of how much Rose wants to resist. And it makes sense, too. In at least one possible future, the two of them did become a couple.

Next time, we'll review our final episode of Smallville.

Year in Review: 2010

In 2010, I was still in college, still slowly beginning my comics reading career by picking up the occasional trade paperback. I was aware of the big events like Blackest Night and Flash: Rebirth, but I wasn't reading them at the time.

In the world of film, Toy Story 3 and Alice in Wonderland were the big winners, each grossing over a billion dollars worldwide. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part 1 was close behind in third place. The world of superheroes was represented only by Iron Man 2, which pulled in a respectable $624 million and was nominated for an Academy Award for best visual effects (but it lost to Inception). There was also a Jonah Hex movie, loosely based on DC's cowboy hero. The movie was a colossal flop, earning less than $11 million against a budget of $47 million. The big winner at the Academy Awards was The King's Speech, earning Oscars for best picture, best director, best actor and best original screenplay.

Bart Allen had a rather interesting 2010. He actually made quite a few appearances thanks to Flash: Rebirth and Blackest Night. But Bart was little more than a background character in all those comics. And even when he finally rejoined the Teen Titans, Bart still wasn't given that much to do. Geoff Johns only seemed to use Bart out of pure obligation, never attempting to delve deeper than the surface levels of the character. Felicia D. Henderson couldn't get out of her own way with her nonsensical, sprawling story. And J.T. Krul pretty much just followed Johns' lead. Even more frustrating was how so many artists chose to draw Bart just like a young Wally West, complete with red hair and freckles. So yes, Bart technically has been brought back to life, but it doesn't really feel like he's alive. We still can't answer some of the most basic questions about him, such as where he lives and goes to school. And that makes handing out these awards a difficult chore for me.

Best Issue: Blackest Night #8

I had a lot of problems with Blackest Night, but at the end of the day, it was a good story. And by far the most excitement we had in 2010. So I'm giving this award to the final issue, the culmination of this event. True, it was a hectic comic with Johns frantically trying to cram in every last idea he had. But it still held an incredible amount of significance in the DC Universe. And Bart was right there in the thick of things. He was turned into a Black Lantern and then, very briefly, a White Lantern that held the key to winning the day once and for all. Of course, this award wasn't so much won by Blackest Night, as it was lost by Flash: Rebirth. What should have been a beautiful celebration of the Flash family let me down in far too many ways.

Best Writer: Geoff Johns

Johns pulled off his second three-peat on this blog, further distancing himself from the other award winners. And, as is often the case for Johns, he mostly wins this award through quantity and not necessarily quality. Although Henderson did have a shot at this award, or at least she would have, had her writing been of a much higher quality. I also suppose I should give credit for what Johns did do, instead of constantly berating him for what he didn't do. As begrudgingly as it may have felt, Johns did include Bart in his stories and the little bit he gave us was better than nothing.

Best Artist: Ivan Reis

Blackest Night would not have been the smash hit it was without the incredible pencils by Reis. The story may have been flawed, but the art wasn't. Reis perfectly represented all of the hundreds of characters he had to draw, while also mastering both the horror and action elements of the story. Yeah, he didn't draw much of Bart, but I always liked his work better than Scott Kolins', José Luís' and definitely Ethan Van Sciver's. This award really should have been Van Sciver's, but I felt his work actually has grown worse through the years. It's amazing to think that the artist that thrilled me so much during his run on Impulse would repulse me as much as he did on Flash: Rebirth. And that's not even taking into account his inexcusable tardiness on the book.

Best Supporting Character: Superboy

Since Bart has been relegated to a supporting character himself, this award essentially is the Best Friend award. And in any case, this is Superboy's second time winning the award. The two were resurrected together and joined Teen Titans together, where Bart became Conner's main confidant to help him with girl troubles. And although Henderson's story was largely incomprehensible, she did do a good job of establishing Kid Flash and Superboy as experienced superheroes. Sadly, Superboy mainly wins this award because of the failures of everybody else in Bart's life. Max Mercury came back, but promptly disappeared and was never mentioned again. Wally basically did nothing. And Barry never really bonded with his grandson, even after helping free him from the Black Lantern ring. And tragically, good old Tim Drake has insisted on keeping his distance from all his old friends. At least Bart has Kon to talk to.

Best Villain: Nekron

The driving force behind Blackest Night was hands-down the biggest threat Bart faced this year. Yeah, Eobard Thawne was a menace in Flash: Rebirth, but the biggest obstacle of that story was mainly getting Barry to stop whining. And, when you really think about it, the only reason Eobard was even there to begin with was because of Nekron's interference. I don't know if turning Bart into a Black Lantern technically counts as killing him, but it's the next best thing. And any villain who gets that close to killing our guy deserves this award.

Well, that's it for comics with the publication date in the year 2010. In 2011, we'll have a lot more Teen Titans, a little Superboy, a return to the Flash (shocking, right?), another Smallville episode and the largest reality-altering event in DC history — Flashpoint. It all begins with Teen Titans #89.

Teen Titans #88

Team Building

J.T. Krul – Writer
Nicola Scott – Penciller
Doug Hazlewood – Inker
Sal Cipriano – Letterer
Jason Wright – Colorist
Rachel Gluckstern – Editor
Scott & Hazlewood with Wright – Cover
Adam Hughes – Variant Cover

Our cover shows our new lineup in a generic, yet energetic superhero team pose. Basically everybody who left last issue has not come back, and the only "new" addition is Ravager, returning to the Teen Titans for her second (third?) stint with the team. Scott is a decent artist, but I'm not entirely on board with her style. Superboy looks like he's 30 years old. Wonder Girl has an unsettling maniacal grin. And Kid Flash not only has very red hair, but copious freckles to match. Why is everybody turning him into a young Wally West?

Our variant cover focuses on the female members of the team, and I think it looks pretty good. It's something different, something unique. The kind of artistic take that I believe is perfect for variant covers. Main covers? Not so much.

Our story begins with a mysterious person/organization observing a 17-year-old boy named Barney. He's a foster child with no friends or family or any aptitudes in school. All of these qualities make Barney a "prime candidate." We then cut to an action-packed two-page spread of our heroes fighting a bunch of monsters in downtown San Francisco.

Everyone is here, except Ravager, who gets her own splash page on the next page. Anyway, the "monsters" are all teenage boys with sharp teeth and claws and uncontrollable, vicious, primal personalities. And these "feral boys" apparently all climbed out of the sewer. Once all the bystanders are safe, Wonder Girl asks Kid Flash to scout the sewers for any more of these boys. Bart complains that this city produces over 80 million gallons of wastewater every day, and he asks Superboy to just use his x-ray vision. But Conner claims there's too much lead in the pipes, so he teasingly tells Bart to hold his breath down there.

One of the feral boys bites Beast Boy's shoulder, and Ravager responds by slicing his hand off, which Wonder Girl believes was a step too far. Raven examines one of the boys and determines they were human, but something stripped away their minds and dulled their sense of pain. Bart emerges from the sewer, saying beside destroying his appetite for the next year, his scouting expedition was completely pointless. He asks what he missed, and Rose coldly says, "Nothing. We won."

At Titans Tower that night, Cassie and Gar search their computers for any information on these feral boys. Cassie initially suspected they might be connected to the old Titans villains the Wildebeests, but she's unable to find any solid leads. So she sends some DNA samples to  Doctor Mid-Nite, all while lamenting that Tim Drake isn't here to work on this mystery.

Beast Boy then questions Wonder Girl's decision to let Ravager join the team, much like he questioned Cyborg for making Hawk a Titan not too long ago. Cassie said she was actually surprised that Rose accepted the invitation. She admits that the deaths of Marvin and Red Devil and the panic with Bombshell and Aquagirl have caused her to seek out more experienced team members. Cassie implies that Bombshell and Aquagirl were found, but she doesn't elaborate on why they went missing or where they are now. Nor does she mention Static Shock, Miss Martian or Blue Beetle.

Meanwhile, Conner passes Rose in the hallway, as she's coming back from the gym, wearing next to nothing. She flirts with Conner a bit before walking away. Bart, who watched the whole thing from his room, comments on how sexy Rose's eye patch is. Conner instinctively agrees, before catching himself with an unconvincing "Wait. What? No." Bart mocks Conner's "nice recovery," then shows off his latest project. His room is covered in post-it notes, scrap pieces of paper and piles of books. Bart explains that he still has the ability to remember everything he reads, and when he was revived in the future, he took a moment to read everything he could in the 31st century library. But now that information is starting to fade away — he suspects it has something to do with the time stream — so Bart's decided to try to write down everything he can still remember before he forgets it all. Even though he hasn't used any of this information yet, Bart believes it may one day prove useful. Conner points out a prominent drawing of a spherical vehicle, and Bart admits he has no idea what it is, but vows he'll be able to figure it all out once he gets every little nugget written down somewhere.

We then check in on Raven, who is meditating in her room. She can see all her teammates' emotions, much like the Black Lanterns. Bart is yellow with fear, distressed by losing his memories, Conner is green with willpower, Rose is red with anger, Cassie is also green with will, and Gar is blue with hope. Raven and Beast Boy shared an intimate moment not too long ago, but Raven is afraid of experiencing too much emotion and unleashing the Trigon side of her, so she's once again broken off her relationship with Gar. But instead of being heartbroken, Beast Boy is filled with hope this time that things will eventually work out at the end of the day.

In Gotham City, the Dick Grayson Batman and Damian Wayne Robin are battling a knife-wielding villain named Brutale. Robin defeats the villain and almost slits his throat, but stops at the last second, ominously saying "there's always next time." As Dick drives Damian back in the Batmobile, Damian reiterates that he wasn't actually going to kill Brutale. Even though Dick didn't say anything, Damian can tell he was disturbed by that little stunt, and he mocks Dick for not being as subtle as Bruce. Dick points out that he never wanted to be like Bruce, and the key difference between the two of them is that Dick actually had friends when he was younger.

We then return to our friend Barney, walking home after working a closing shift at Burger Point. His biology teacher, Mr. Carter, just happens to be driving by in the middle of the night, and he talks to Barney about how difficult it must be struggling through life without any real friends or family. Mr. Carter offers Barney a chance to "do a lot more than simply get by." Not having anything to lose, Barney accepts Mr. Carter's ride to his house.

Even though Mr. Carter lives in an unassuming townhouse, the building boasts a massive basement filled with scientific equipment. Barney spots one of the feral boys curled up in a cage in the corner, and Dr. Carter brushes it aside as a "crude experiment" that merely served to provide some illuminating results. A normal person would probably run away screaming from that sight and call the police, but Barney only half-heartedly says, "Maybe this isn't a good idea. Is it going to hurt?" Dr. Carter tells Barney that when he's through with him, he won't have to be embarrassed, intimidated or afraid anymore. And that's apparently more than enough to convince Barney to undergo this mysterious procedure.

Later, Barney's head is shaved and he's dressed in a hospital gown and strapped down to an operating table. Only now does he start to get a tiny bit nervous, asking Mr. Carter if he's still there. The biology teacher emerges wearing a red robe with a pointed hood, saying his name is actually Doctor Caligan. He then throws a switch that electrocutes Barney, causing him to scream out in pain.

Meanwhile, Gar is flipping channels on the TV before settling on a late-night viewing of Pride and Prejudice. Conner pops in, asking where everyone is. Gar says, "Beats me." So Conner asks what he really wants to know, "Have you seen Cassie?" Gar says they were working in the Com Center, but that was hours ago. So Conner heads out, prompting Gar to compare him to Mr. Darcy.

We see Rose is spending her night combing through the Titans' database, revealing her true intentions for rejoining the team. During Blackest Night, Rose and her family were attacked by zombie versions of several of their deceased family members and friends. But one zombie was notably absent — Rose's mother, Lillian Worth. The Titans' database lists her as deceased, but Rose still believes Lillian is alive somewhere and vows to update to database.

Conner eventually made his way into Cassie's room, but as soon as the two begin kissing, Cassie gets a call from Dr. Mid-Nite. He reports that the feral boys were victims of deliberate genetic manipulation. And although he's encountered similar cases in the past, nothing quite matches this methodology. He says he'll give Cassie a call if he comes up with any more useful data.

Conner tries to get intimate with Cassie again, but he can tell she's still stressed out by being leader of the Teen Titans. He points out that the current roster has been reduced to just their close friends and now they don't need to hide their relationship. But Cassie admits that when they're out in the field, she can't stop worrying about him. Even though he's the strongest member of the team and practically invulnerable, his death still looms over Cassie's mind. She sadly says she doesn't think she can be with Conner and lead the team at the same time.

But before she can elaborate on this point, a silent alarm goes off. Conner and Cassie head out into the hall to locate the intruder, quickly followed by Raven, Beast Boy and Kid Flash dragging Ravager behind them. Apparently Bart "helped" Rose get her costume on quickly so she wouldn't miss out on all the fun. And Rose threatens to run her sword through Bart's stomach if he decides to "help" her like that again. Our heroes then reach the east wing and find the intruders are Batman and Robin. Dick introduces the Titans to Damian, who immediately declares himself as the Robin to lead this "flock."

We then end with a sneak peek page, saying, "The future is bright for Teen Titans!" It shows a black young man rising from the sea, a young woman glowing with a bright light, Superboy kissing another girl as Wonder Girl sadly watches from afar, and Ravager fighting her dad, Deathstroke, once again.




It's actually kind of hilarious that J.T. Krul is ignoring everything Felicia D. Henderson did. And I mean absolutely everything. No explanation for what happened to Aquagirl and Bombshell. No mention of Miss Martian, Static Shock or Blue Beetle. Not even a reference to the Wyld. And you know what? That's a good thing! Henderson's story was awful and the best strategy moving forward is going to be pretend it didn't happen. Well ... for the most part. I am a little frustrated at having endured so many Cassie-Conner moments only to have their inevitable hookup immediately start to deteriorate. And the Raven-Beast Boy relationship is in the same boat. In both cases, the girl in the relationship is pulling away just as soon as they start to actually get close to each other. It is rather frustrating.

It is no surprise that Krul would bring back Ravager as soon as he could. He set up the whole suspicion of Rose's mom still being alive, so it only makes sense that he would want to keep exploring that idea. However, I wish we had a more substantial reason for Ravager joining the team other than Wonder Girl calling her out of the blue. In any case, it will be interesting to see if anything happens between Rose and Bart. He's had a rather mild attraction to her since the '90s, and things look like they're heating up again. I mean, he ran into her room and put her costume on her. That's not just an innocent gag for someone of Bart's age. (And don't get me started on Bart's age. There's still a strong possibility he remembers all his experiences of the year and a half he spent as an adult.)

For better and worse, it looks like Krul is trying to recapture the same vibe and setup Geoff Johns had on this book. I am glad that he brought back the idea of Bart's photographic memory — something that has been completely forgotten the past couple of years. But I don't need Bart to constantly spout of random facts like a know-it-all. And I really wish Nicola Scott didn't draw Bart like he was Wally. Scott is a competent artist, but I don't really like how she draws faces. I find myself cringing a bit too much when looking at her work. But, it is an upgrade to José Luís.

Well, that's it for the year 2010. Next time, we'll have our Year in Review before returning to Teen Titans #89.

Untold Tales of Blackest Night #1

The Evolution of Species

Writer: Adam Schlagman
Pencils: Jason Fabok
Inks: Ryan Winn
Colors: Alex Sinclair
Letters: Travis Lanham

Our cover by Tyler Kirkham, Matt Banning and Nei Ruffino showcases several characters who kind of got overlooked during Blackest Night — an error this issue attempts to rectify. The only two we care about are Donna Troy, front and center, and, to a much lesser extent, Animal Man, bottom right corner. Sadly, this is a rather bland, uninspiring cover. I'm most disappointed in Donna's face. She's a fierce warrior, who's going through a traumatic experience of fighting zombie versions of her deceased family, and she's fighting off a Black Lantern infection in her neck. So why does she look so bored?

Our variant cover by Ethan Van Sciver is an incomprehensible mess from a side story about a Yellow Lantern we don't care about. So we'll just quickly move on from that gruesome scene.

It is fitting that an event like Blackest Night would rise from the dead months after reaching its conclusion. This issue contains a bunch of short stories and some deleted scenes from that massive, never-ending event. Even though it went on for eight issues and dozens of tie-ins, Geoff Johns really had enough story for 12 issues. And apparently he was pretty bummed out that some of his scenes never made it in print. Until now. Anyway, Bart Allen appears in the background of two short stories here, so let's get going.

Our first story is about Animal Man, who was planning on celebrating Heroes Day with a quiet barbecue in his backyard with his family. Suddenly, he's attacked by a charging swarm of extinct animals, and Buddy Baker has to scramble to save his son from the zombie beasts. The animals are quickly reduced to piles of bones, arranged in the shape of the Black Lantern symbol, and Buddy hears Nekron's voice in his head, asking why he's still alive.

Later, Animal Man joins the Justice League and Titans in Coast City, heroically flying right over Kid Flash's next, side-by-side with Starfire. Buddy and Kory had quite the adventure together during 52, so they make a pretty good team against this army of the undead. Until the Black Lantern "Batman" spits out the black rings and one of them turns Animal Man into a Black Lantern. Buddy is horrified as he's unable to prevent himself from attacking Starfire and ... well, basically attempting to rape her. Luckily, Starfire realizes the real Buddy would never behave this way, so she doesn't hold it against him.

Eventually, a white ring connects with Animal Man, turning him into a White Lantern. Buddy hears the Entity's voice in his head, explaining that Nekron did not "allow" Buddy's multiple resurrections, but Buddy kept coming back because he chose to. The Entity tells Buddy he still has a lot to fight for, and he has more power than he realizes. Finally, the day is saved, and Buddy is able to return home, where his family lovingly embraces him, then quickly demands he take a shower because he stinks.




I've always found the dynamic of Animal Man's family to be very sweet. And that might be mainly because it's one of the very few functional family units in the whole DC Universe. Anyway, this story was nice, but rushed. The extinct animals were cool, but didn't make any sense. And Fabok's art was less than stellar on this story, particularly with characters' faces and eyes.


A Losing Battle

Written by: J.T. Krul
Artist: Ed Benes
Colors: Brian Buccellato
Letters: Rob Clark Jr.

Our next story takes us back to Titans Tower in San Francisco on Heroes Day. Wonder Girl takes responsibility for the death of Marvin and laments that they haven't had time to erect a statue of Kid Devil yet. She asks Donna Troy how she can keep fighting after enduring so much loss, and Donna says she always keeps in mind what would happen to the world if she stopped fighting.

We jump ahead to the big fight in Coast City, and Donna's infection in her neck is growing worse. She feels the same way she felt when she was killed by a Superman robot. Wonder Woman comes to check on her, and Donna can see the purple emotion of love coming from her. Suddenly, Donna loses control of her body and attacks Cassie. She wraps her hands around Cassie's throat, but is able to speak, saying they need to find Dove so she can kill her. Cassie sadly says, "I know," displaying the indigo emotion of compassion.

Cassie calls out to some nearby Titans to help, and Cyborg and Superboy pull Donna off Cassie. Dove also responds to the call, and Cassie asks her to get rid of Donna's infection without killing her. But Dove isn't sure if she can, noting the Black Lanterns she destroyed was basically by accident. Cassie urges her to try anyway, so Dove begins blasting Donna with a ray of light. Donna screams out in pain, but just at that moment, the Black Lantern "Batman" appears and a black ring attaches itself to Donna.

Cassie is horrified to see the Black Lanterns have claimed her idol, Wonder Woman, her boyfriend, Superboy, and her mentor, Donna Troy. For a brief second, she wonders how she can possibly fight them all. But then she remembers Donna's words from the beginning of this story and vows to keep fighting to the very end, no matter what.




I always felt like the Donna Troy bite was a worthless, overlooked element of the Blackest Night story. So now we get an opportunity to actually explore the ramification of this bite and ... nothing happened. We saw that maybe the bite might have turned Donna into a Black Lantern, but then the fake Batman barfed up the rings and that totally negated the whole point. Really, the only thing I appreciated from this story was the acknowledgment that Kid Devil died before Blackest Night. But now I'm mad that we didn't get to see a zombie Kid Devil during this event. Anyway, Benes' art was decent enough in this story, as long as you overlook his obsession with drawing women's butts and boobs.

Next time, we'll wrap up the year 2010 by launching a new era of Teen Titans.

Teen Titans #87

Eclipsed

Felicia D. Henderson Writer
Jose Lúís Penciller
Mariah Benes & Eber Ferreira Inkers
Sal Cipriano Letterer
Marcelo Maiolo Colorist
Rachel Gluckstern Editor
Joe Prado with Rod Reis Cover

Our cover is a rather weak attempt at an inspiring "all hands in" image. The perspective is rather nonsensical if you really think about it — are some of our heroes floating in midair? Anyway, this cover does serve as the final gathering of this Teen Titans lineup. Several of these characters will leave the team by the end of this issue. And with next issue, we'll get a new creative team and new characters added to the Titans. For better and worse.

Our story picks up with our team caught in a massive spider's web. And for the first time on the Wyld's world, they encounter an actual monster — a gigantic spider spinning the web. Miss Martian's astral-self takes control of the spider's mind and has it dissolve the web before going to sleep. Wonder Girl tries to ask Miss Martian how she got here and what's going on, but Megan will only say they need to hurry before the eclipse.

The Wyld, meanwhile, is mocking Raven, saying, "Dear Mother. Having a great time at camp. Wish I didn't have to kill you." He explains that on the last total lunar eclipse, the Wyld was a bunch of separate animals that got fused together by Raven's dark-self. And now the Wyld is waiting for the next eclipse to consume her to gain all her powers and then rule over her world. Raven finds it impossible that she created something so evil. She explains that even though she's the daughter of a demon, her heart is her own, and she urges the Wyld to not give in to his dark instincts. But the Wyld is hearing none of that.

Our heroes finally — finally! — catch up to Raven, with Superboy and Wonder Girl smashing a hole through the cave wall. The Wyld grows maybe a foot taller to face this threat, and Kid Flash mocks this sudden growth spurt. But the Wyld pounds the ground hard enough to knock down Bart, Beast Boy and Static Shock. He hits Wonder Girl with a powerful punch before blasting Superboy with a ray of kryptonite vision (because why not?). Static works on freeing Raven, telling her to take down the Wyld, but Raven complains that her powers work differently on this world. Static says his powers are also different here, but he actually believes he's now more powerful on this world.

The Wyld hits Wonder Girl with a blast of electricity, and Beast Boy turns into a bear to try to squeeze the life out of the Wyld. Raven tends to Superboy, but finds she can't remove the kryptonite poisoning from him. Luckily, Static suddenly discovers that his new powers enable him to drain the kryptonite from Superboy (because why not?). Kid Flash tries to help Beast Boy take on the Wyld, but he promptly gets smacked down again.

Static redirects the absorbed kryptonite at the Wyld, but it has no affect on him. The Wyld counters with another blast of electricity, but Static begins to absorb all the energy directed at him. Cassie checks in on Conner, lamely saying, "How're we gonna get to 'till death do us part' if you keep trying to do the parting-part so fast?" As Static begins to blast the Wyld, something even more strange happens. Raven begs Static to stop, saying she's trying to force benevolence into the Wyld's heart and she now needs more time. Static says they only have seconds before the eclipse, which is why he launches into a lengthy diatribe, recounting the entire team's journey up to this point and how they've risked so much to get here.

Wonder Girl physically restrains Raven from running to the Wyld's side, as she and Superboy lecture her on the nature of true family. Static continues to blast the Wyld, even as the eclipse reaches its full state. The Wyld feels a surge of power, but Static continues his all-out assault until he vaporizes the Wyld. Raven says she can feel the Wyld's gone now, and asks Wonder Girl and Superboy to let her go. Conner says it had to be done, and Raven sadly agrees with him.

Even though Raven said the Wyld was gone, she also says the Wyld's energy is still present, and now the planet is destroying itself in mourning. Bart asks how they're going to get out now, referring to all the keyhole and dimensional doorway stuff. Beast Boy suggests Raven may be able to teleport out, since she's been here before, but Raven says she can only teleport herself. Once again, though, Static's extremely vague and limitless powers come to the rescue. He says if Raven teleports home, he can use her "port trail" to open a door for everybody. And naturally, this insane plan works perfectly.

Our heroes arrive in Titans Tower, where Dr. Rochelle Barnes and Cyborg are waiting for them. Cyborg tells Beast Boy he's never been so happy to see him, and Rochelle says she needs to quarantine everybody to make sure they didn't bring back any bacteria or radiation from the Wyld's dimension. Static suddenly complains of feeling sick and promptly barfs up a black blob that instantly vanishes in a bright "ping."

In the infirmary, Cassie dramatically tells Cyborg that she somehow knew he'd be here when they returned, even though Cyborg literally did nothing this whole time to help find Raven. And Cyborg confirms as much, saying he's only here to report the disappearance of Aquagirl and Bombshell. Even though just last issue, Rochelle had direct radio contact with them and had sent Cadmus out to their location, the two heroes have become lost at sea. Cyborg says Green Lantern and Superman are currently searching for them, and Cassie says the Teen Titans will join the search in 24 hours. Rochelle then turns to Virgil and says her tests indicate that he has lost his powers.

Once the quarantine is lifted, Raven visits Gar in his room to thank him for rescuing her. He says Virgil and Megan deserve all the credit. Raven brushes this aside, saying she'll go searching for Aquagirl and Bombshell in the morning. Beast Boy offers to help, but Raven refuses to put anyone on the team in jeopardy again. She then closes the door to give the two of them some privacy, but still promises to leave in the morning.

Cyborg visits Virgil, who is currently packing his bags, to advise him to take up Dr. Barnes' offer to be looked over by Cadmus. Virgil says he wants to go home, complaining that he's now powerless to help Megan (who has fallen into another coma) or find the missing Titans. But Cyborg insists that Virgil can't return to Dakota without his powers, so he's going to make sure he goes to Cadmus whether he likes it or not.

Conner and Cassie have sex and talk about Cassie's letting herself get worked up over her leadership responsibilities. And for some reason, Bart spends the night in the infirmary, sleeping shirtless on a bed next to Megan. He thanks her for saving their lives and says they need to figure out how to return the favor.

In the morning, Cyborg hints to Rochelle that he knows her secrets, but chooses not to reveal them at this time, even though he doesn't agree with her deception. The rest of the team comes down for breakfast, and Bart, being impressed by the spread, says they should do more early morning meetings. Gar teases him for being a "big idea man" and Bart tells Gar to bite him. Rochelle tells everyone that she plans to take Megan to Cadmus to try to restore healthy brain function in her. Virgil offers to accompany Megan to Cadmus, which surprises Cassie, because she knew how much he wanted to go home. Conner suggests he could go to Cadmus instead, referring to his long history with that organization. But Virgil insists on making the trip, saying he'll let the scientists poke and prod him all they want, just so long he makes sure Megan receives the best possible care. So everyone gets dressed and bids farewell to Static Shock, Miss Martian, Dr. Rochelle Barnes and Cyborg.

And that's it! The Henderson-Luís run has finally, painfully reached its conclusion. No more wild, confusing stories that often contradict themselves! No more melodramatic passive-agressive Cassie-Conner moments! No more pandering to Static Shock and inexplicably making him the most powerful and versatile hero of all time! No more dressing everybody in tank tops — even Cyborg, inexplicably! Well ... we can hope, at least. There's no guarantee the new creative team will be any better. But in the meantime, I am more than happy to say goodbye to this team.

Let's review what we just read. The Wyld, an amalgam of random animals inadvertently fused together by Raven, wielding vast, but undefined powers, visits Earth, poses as one of Holocaust's henchmen and allows himself to be captured just so he can take Raven back to his dimension, where he has to wait for a lunar eclipse before he can consume her. OK. A little more convoluted than necessary, but I think I got it. Cyborg was present at Raven's abduction, but instead of helping his former teammates search for his old friend, he chooses to send two random scientists to the tower in his place. One of the scientists is killed, but nobody notices or asks any questions about where he went. The other scientist is apparently not human, possessing powers that are as vague as they are powerful. But for unknown reasons, she has chosen to conceal this side of herself.

When Superboy and Kid Flash joined the team, the size of the roster became unmanageable. So Henderson began doing everything she could to pare down the players involved. Raven was promptly kidnapped. Blue Beetle left the team without any fanfare. Miss Martian was placed in a perpetual state of being "out of commission" except for when the plot demanded a deus ex machina. Bombshell and Aquagirl are exiled to the bottom of the sea and not allowed to come back. Last issue, it just seemed like they'd be sent to the hospital to deal with convenient injuries, but that apparently wasn't dramatic enough, so now they've gone missing once again. And now Static Shock and Miss Martian are gone, too, off to explore plot lines that won't be covered in this series. Granted, all these departures were probably necessary. But none of it felt natural. Much of this story seemed like one hasty course correction after another.

And the only consistent thing about the Wyld and its dimension was the complete and utter lack of consistency. Some heroes' powers changed on the other world, but only in the weirdest and lamest of ways. Ice vision for Superboy? Woop-de-doo! Oh, and Static can now basically do anything he can imagine? OK, fine. Anybody else? Nope. Not even a little. I also kind of liked the idea of the Wyld's world being completely devoid of any lifeforms. Almost as if all life was melded together into that one evil entity. And for the first few issues, this theory worked. Our heroes only battled lifeless threats — tumbleweeds, rocks, trees, etc. But then this issue all of a sudden threw a giant spider at us. OK, sure, let's get rid of that one bit of consistency. And that makes it only fitting for the conclusion of this story to be full of equally random moments. Like Raven trying to get her teammates to stop fighting the Wyld for no reason whatsoever. And Static suddenly receiving the power of a god. And how about that eclipse? We spent so much time worrying about what would happen when we reach full eclipse. And guess what happens when the eclipse hits? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Our characters got all worked up for no reason whatsoever.

Suffice it to say, I was not a fan of Henderson's run on Teen Titans. But I am glad that Bart had a home in comics at this time. Especially since Geoff Johns refused to use him in the new Flash series.

Next time, we'll return to a massive event we all thought was over in Untold Tales of Blackest Night #1.

Teen Titans #86

Miss Martian's Wyld

Felicia D. Henderson Writer
José Luís Penciller
Mariah Benes Inker
Marcelo Maiolo Colorist
Sal Cipriano Letterer
Joe Prado with Rod Reis Cover
Rachel Gluckstern Editor

Our cover brings a hasty end to the stint of Luís drawing his own covers. This image by Prado finally puts Raven front and center — remember, she's the whole focus of this story, right? However, I can't tell if Raven is saving her teammates or causing them to writhe in pain. Of course, it wouldn't be a Teen Titans cover without some errors. Bombshell is still in the belly of a beast at the bottom of the sea and Miss Martian is back in Titans Tower. And, frankly, I don't think any of these characters look that good. They all seem a little off.

Our 75th anniversary cover by Michael Allred honors the original Teen Titans in all their glorious campiness of the 1960s. It's a cute, bright change of pace from this dark and dour journey to rescue Raven from the Wyld.

Our story picks up where we left off, with Miss Martian falling under control of the Wyld in Titans Tower. Although last issue clearly showed that Doctors Rochelle and Vincent Barnes were also possessed, in this issue, they are completely in control of their own faculties. The Wyld, for some reason, demands to have the helmet taken of Megan's head. Megan regains control, saying she always knew the Wyld was inside of her, which is why she didn't join the search for Raven. She then warns the doctors that she can't hold off the Wyld much longer. But instead of running, the doctors pull the helmet off Megan, at which point the Wyld takes control once again.

The Wyld promptly picks up Vincent by the throat, and when Rochelle tries to tranquilize Megan from behind, she drops Vincent and knocks down Rochelle in one smooth motion. Before Rochelle can get back on her feet, the Wyld jabs Vincent in the chest, killing him instantly. The Wyld then turns on Rochelle, who defends herself with a strange, green light that we can't clearly see. The Wyld is shocked by this power and notes that Rochelle isn't human. Rochelle says, "Guess that makes two of us," as Miss Martian collapses to the ground unconscious. Rochelle then drags her husband's corpse away, asking him to forgive her.

When Megan wakes up, she conveniently has no memory of her time under the Wyld's control. Rochelle chooses to lie to Megan, saying their first attempt with the helmet merely knocked her out, so they decided to take a quick break. Rochelle also unconvincingly says that Vincent suddenly had to go back to Cadmus. Luckily for her, Megan is too distracted to pick up on this obvious lie, and demands to put the helmet back on immediately. Rochelle secretly believes her little green energy stunt "blasted the Wyld back to its world for good," so she agrees to put the helmet back on Megan, only half-heartedly reminding her of the dangers involved.

This time, the helmet works perfectly, and Miss Martian is quickly able to locate Aquagirl and Bombshell inside the massive sea serpent. Sending out her astral-self, Megan uses her psychic powers to tell the monster to vomit out Aquagirl and Bombshell then go away. Our heroes then reopen the keyhole to enable Miss Martian's astral-self to journey to the Wyld's world. As she takes off, Bombshell reports that her armor has begun to crack under the strain of being under too much pressure for too long, which means her radioactive energies have likely poisoned Aquagirl, too. So Rochelle arranges for Cadmus to rescue them and get them the necessary medical treatment.

Miss Martian's astral-self soon arrives in the Wyld's world, where she promptly engages in a vague psychic battle with the Wyld. Megan calls out to Wonder Girl and tells her about the eclipse. Cassie smashes out of some rocks and rescues Superboy first and they share a romantic kiss. They then rescue Kid Flash, and Conner jokes about how Bart's always cranky after being knocked out. Beast Boy is fine, but Virgil is also still unconscious. So Megan wakes up Static and Bart, and Cassie tells them they have a time limit on rescuing Raven.

We're then given a rather unclear image of an impending eclipse. Is this the moon moving in front of the sun on Earth? Or on the Wyld's world? Nobody says.

Static Shock and Kid Flash hop onto the back of the pteranodon Beast Boy, and they all begin flying toward Raven. Beast Boy begs Wonder Girl and Superboy to fly on ahead, but Cassie insists on staying all together. Suddenly, everyone is ensnared in giant spider webs, and Gar can't help but say they should have listened to him. And once again, the elements of this world have a dampening effect on our heroes' powers — Bart can't vibrate free of the webs, and Static can't even generate a spark.

We then finally check in with Raven, who is buried up to her neck in rocks. Megan wakes her up, just in time for Raven to see essentially a male version of herself walking toward her. Naturally, this is the Wyld, who ominously greets Raven with a "Hi, Mom."




I feel like Felicia D. Henderson wrote herself into a corner last issue and she only got out of that corner this issue by merely ignoring the problems she introduced. The doctors and Miss Martian are possessed?! Never mind, only Miss Martian is possessed. The tower has lost all contact with the outside world?! Never mind, we can call up Cadmus and the Titans on the radio just fine now. And how do we free Miss Martian from the Wyld's control? By doing something incredibly vague and magical just off panel that will never be explained. I'm serious. There's a 99% chance we will never find out what was going on with Dr. Rochelle Barnes.

The bit about the eclipse is too underdeveloped to add any real tension to this story. But it does serve the purpose of explaining why the Wyld hasn't killed Raven yet. Sort of. I mean, I don't know exactly how the eclipse is supposed to make the Wyld any stronger, but there you go. At this point, everything has become incredibly tedious, and I'm more than ready for it to end.

Next: Family issues!

Action Comics #892

A Look at Things to Come in ... Superboy

Jeff Lemire – Writer
Pier Gallo – Artist
Jamie Grant – Colorist
Rob Leigh – Letterer
Wil Moss – Asst. Editor
Matt Idelson – Editor

Our cover by David Finch shows Lex Luthor battling Deathstroke. Yeah ... Action Comics has kind of become Luthor's book for the time being. Anyway, it's a decent enough cover, but we only care about the little note at the bottom teasing the Superboy Second Feature.

We also have a variant cover by Ivan Reis to commemorate DC's 75th anniversary. This is an update of Carmine Infantino's famous Flash vs. Superman race from 1967. Ironically, though, that cover wasn't from Action Comics, but Superman #199. It's a nice homage, although it has nothing to do with the main story or backup story in this issue.

Our backup story is actually just a preview of the upcoming Superboy series. You'd think such a preview would be placed in Adventure Comics, which was his home for the past year, but I guess once he got kicked out, he was never allowed back. Anyway, this story drops us right in the middle of the action, showing events that won't actually happen for a few issues in Superboy's new series.

We open on Smallville being attacked by a bunch of large mud monsters. Joining Superboy are Beast Boy, Raven (guess she will be rescued from the Wyld), Kid Flash and a couple of new heroes from Conner's high school class. Our heroes struggle with the monsters, as they appear impervious to pain and constantly reform whenever broken apart. Bart's mission was to find Lori Luthor (Lex's niece), but he's come up empty, even after searching the whole town three times. Eventually, Superboy loses his patience and smashes every mud monster in about two seconds flat, ending with a heroic landing.

Bart calls that stunt "awesome," but Conner's friend, Simon, points out that the monsters still will be able to reform. While they try to come up with a plan, Raven makes a shocking discovery. Superboy's attack opened up a secret tunnel, revealing Lori tied up next to another boy and surrounded by grotesque pig monsters. Lori calls for help, but before anyone can react, the Phantom Stranger suddenly appears and says that if Superboy goes into that tunnel then Smallville will die.




Mud monsters, pig creatures and the Phantom Stranger? It doesn't get more wild than that. I'm not a fan of this art style, but otherwise this was an exciting preview for a new series. And I appreciate the ingenuity of not merely showing the first few pages of the first issue, but taking us right to a shocking, exciting scene halfway through the opening arc.

Next time, we'll return to the unbearable Wyld story in Teen Titans #86.

Teen Titans #85

First, Do No Harm

Felicia D. Henderson Writer
José Luís Penciller
Mariah Benes Inker
Marcelo Maiolo Colorist
Sal Cipriano Letterer
Luís and Benes with Maiolo Cover
Rachel Gluckstern Editor

Our cover puts Kid Flash front and center, showing him ensnared by a twisting tentacle of dirt and rock. All his teammates behind him are battling actual monsters, which would be fine, if any of this actually happened in the story we're about to read. Bombshell and Aquagirl got swallowed by a giant sea monster last issue — back on Earth, not on the Wyld's world. Miss Martian also stayed behind on Earth and shouldn't be here, either. Superboy shouldn't be using heat vision, but ice vision (don't ask me why, but that's what previous issues established). And there aren't any actual monsters for the Teen Titans to battle on this world. Also, the sky isn't red. But beyond all that, the cover's fine. If nothing else, I am glad that the issue's artists also did the cover so readers at least know what the art inside is going to look like.

Our story picks up with Miss Martian telling Doctors Rochelle and Vincent Barnes that she needs to help her friends fight the Wyld, claiming she now knows how this monster thinks. But the doctors tell Miss Martian there really isn't anything they can do right now, as they'd need Aquagirl and Bombshell to activate the keyhole to send Miss Martian to the Wyld's dimension, but those two heroes aren't responding to their communicators right now. And we see that Aquagirl and Bombshell are still alive and well inside the belly of the beast that swallowed them, but they are having a rather difficult time trying to get out.

Back on the Wyld's world, all our heroes are being electrocuted and have collapsed to the ground. Static Shock manages to soak up the electrical field, but it takes a lot out of him, and he also collapses. Bart complains that he's experiencing his first migraine, and Superboy checks on him before immediately springing to Wonder Girl's side. She asks how Static is, and Kon says he can hear his heartbeat. Beast Boy once again complains that he's the only one who's worried about Raven, but Bart's optimistic that their little "radio" stunt gave Superboy a read on Raven's location. Luckily, Kon confirms that this is true.

Later, in Titans Tower, Vincent reports that the tower's security has been countermanded, locking them out of circuitry, satellite and mobile tower — somehow. Miss Martian scans the doctor's minds and tells them it's time for them to build the device they've secretly been working on. She also reports that the Wyld is unable to rule this world until Raven is dead, and it can't kill Raven until there's a full eclipse.

Meanwhile, in the world of the Wyld, Cassie, Bart and the still unconscious Virgil are riding on the elephant Beast Boy, as Superboy leads the way to Raven. They soon run into a couple of trees, and although Beast Boy easily smashes through the branches, the trees form together one large humanoid shape. Cassie tells Gar to get Static to safety and asks Bart to create a diversion to help her battle the tree monster. Bart starts running around the feet of the monster, but that doesn't seem to do anything, as it easily grabs hold of Kon and Cassie. Superboy is unable to tell if he's actually weaker on this world or if the monster is just that strong.

Beast Boy turns into a T-rex and grabs hold of the tree monster. Superboy and Wonder Girl are both freed from the monster's grasp, and they thank Kid Flash, although I'm not exactly sure what Bart actually did to help. Regardless, Cassie is able to get her lasso around the monster and Superboy smashes its head off.

Our heroes continue their journey to the cave that holds Raven captive, with the pteranodon Beast Boy carrying Bart and Virgil. Kon and Cassie are flying side-by-side up ahead. Kon asks if she's OK, and she stoically says that as team leader, she always has to be all right, even for the guy she loves. Superboy tells himself not to respond to this, for fear of proving he's "whipped." Static finally wakes up and Bart advises him to take it easy after absorbing so much of the Wyld's electricity.

Cassie thanks Virgil for his help back there, although she admits she doesn't know how he did it (or even what he did, if we're being honest with ourselves). Our heroes finally reach the cave, but they're immediately hit by a blast from a fiery geyser. Everyone starts to fall, and Superboy calls out to Cassie and Gar, while Cassie only calls Conner's name. The blast turned Gar back into his human form, and he immediately plays the role of a martyr, begging his teammates to save Raven no matter what. Static asks Kid Flash to shoot a wind tunnel at him before he falls into a pool of lava, but Bart is buried under a pile of rocks and unable to move his legs.

Meanwhile, at Titans Tower, the doctors complete their secret device, after having the requisite conversation about how dangerous it is and how doctors should strive to "do no harm." The device turns out to be a helmet to amplify Miss Martian's telepathic ability, which might allow her to contact her teammates. But as soon as puts the helmet on, Miss Martian becomes possessed by the Wyld, who says the Teen Titans are doomed and he will soon be invincible. The doctors' eyes also turn white, indicating they may also be possessed by the Wyld.




This story is a nonsensical fever dream. Everything is disjointed and completely random. The action scenes are impossible to follow and the awkward dialogue does not match the art. Throw in some clunky exposition and a truly boring plot, and you've got one extremely disappointing comic. I can't wait for this story to end.

Next time, we'll take a welcome break from this fever dream with Action Comics #892.

Teen Titans #84

It's a Wyld Wyld World

Felicia D. Henderson Writer
José Luís Penciller
Mariah Benes Inker
Marcelo Maiolo Colorist
Sal Cipriano Letterer
Joe Bennett & Jack Jadson with Maiolo Cover
Rachel Gluckstern Editor

Our cover shows Aquagirl and Bombshell about to be eaten by a giant sea monster. But Superboy, Miss Martian and Blue Beetle are there to save them. Unfortunately, this is our second consecutive cover that really gives us a misleading idea of what happens in this issue. Yes, Aquagirl and Bombshell will battle a sea monster, but they'll do so on Earth, not a different dimension with a red sky. Superboy, though, will be in another dimension, while Miss Martian will continue to recover in the Teen Titans tower. And Blue Beetle isn't even a member of the team anymore. Also, when we get to the other dimension, the sky will not be red, as the previous two covers indicated. There's either a serious lack of communication going on between our creators, or a lot of last-minute changes. The end result is a rather frustrating read for me.

Our story opens with Dr. Vincent Barnes taking Aquagirl and Bombshell out in a helicopter to the South Atlantic, near West Africa, while Dr. Rochelle Barnes takes Superboy, Beast Boy, Kid Flash, Static Shock and Wonder Girl to the North Pacific, near East Asia. (Apparently these scientists are also accomplished pilots.) Equipped with a scuba suit, Bombshell dives into the water with Aquagirl, and sure enough, they had to fight their way past a bunch of mutated fish to get to the portal, which Aquagirl unlocks by stabbing it with a trident.

The rest of our heroes faced no dangers on their abandoned island, and casually walked through the portal when it opened up. They emerge on the Wyld's world, which is a gray, desolate place. They immediately position themselves in a circle and make sure the coast is clear before Beast Boy transforms into a dog to pick up Raven's scent. Cassie reminds everyone that the physics of this dimension could work very differently, and Bart says he hopes to get Raven and get out of this "creepy" place as quickly as possible.

Suddenly, the ground beneath our heroes turns into quicksand. And this isn't ordinary quicksand — Superboy and Wonder Girl can't escape it, and Beast Boy can't even transform. Bart decides to try moving the sand from the inside, by vibrating himself. He eventually works his momentum into a full-blown whirlwind, which carries away all the sand. Bart almost gets carried away with this stunt, but his friends call him back — with Virgil dubbing him "Hurricane Bart."

Once our heroes are free, Beat Boy tries again to find Raven's scent, but has no luck. Suddenly, a bunch of razor-sharp tumbleweeds surround everybody. Cassie gets cut, and when Superboy asks if she's OK, she angrily tells him to quit treating her like his girlfriend. Superboy tries to blast the tumbleweeds with his heat vision, but surprisingly finds he now has freeze vision instead. And Static is shocked to see his lightning is now yellow. At Wonder Girl's order, Kid Flash digs a trench around everybody, then uses mini-tornadoes to join the others in fighting off the tumbleweeds.

Eventually, the coast the clear, and Beast Boy offers to try to find Raven's scent again, but Wonder Girl believes that won't work. Kid Flash suggests scouting the area ahead at hyper speed, but Cassie's worried he'd run into obstacles too tough to manage. Gar thinks the risk is worth it for Raven's sake, but Kon shuts him down. Superboy then flies up high in the sky, hoping his super hearing can pick something up. Sadly, he reports no sounds — not even radio. But this gives Static an idea. He asks Bart to "give him enough speed" to send out a radio wave — reasoning that since they're not native to this dimension, they must have distinctive radio pings. So Bart ... uh ... gives Virgil some speed.

Inexplicably, this nonsensical plan actually starts to work. Superboy says he can hear their "radio pings," with Cassie's ping being the loudest. So Static decides to increase the wave to cover the whole dimension, which, for some reason, require Bart to now run circles around him. Superboy starts to hear something, but suddenly he and all the others are struck by lightning.

Meanwhile, Aquagirl and Bombshell are forced to wait at the bottom of the sea to reactivate the keyhole when it's time to bring the search party home. But while waiting, they are swallowed by the giant sea monster we saw on the cover. And in Titans Tower, Miss Martian is warning the scientists that they need to send her to the Wyld's dimension now or her teammates may never come back.




This story is getting worse by the issue. First of all, the idea of Raven being kidnapped is not an entirely new one for this series. Secondly, it was rather conveniently cliché to shoehorn in an underwater mission just to find something for Aquagirl to do. And thirdly, Cassie's attitude toward Conner is unjustified and very tiresome by now. But all of those things wouldn't be that big of a problem if the story itself just made sense. I'm perfectly fine with the Wyld's dimension being a desolate place that defends itself. But why did Superboy's heat vision turn to freeze vision? If this is supposed to be a bizarro world, then how come no one else got different powers? Truthfully, this story would be a lot more interesting if our heroes had to adapt to new (or no) powers on the fly. But instead, we're stuck with this half-formed, inconsistent idea. And I doubt anyone can adequately explain to me what was going on with Static's "radio pings."

To be continued!

Teen Titans #83

A Rift in a Haystack

Felicia D. Henderson – Writer
José Luís – Penciller
Mariah Benes – Inker
Marcelo Maiolo – Colorist
Travis Lanham – Letterer
Rachel Gluckstern – Editor
Joe Bennett & Jack Jadson with Rod Reis – Cover

Our cover shows several of our heroes in what appears to be another dimension, trying to save Raven from ... her soul-self? I don't know — it's rather confusing. And nothing at all like this happens in this issue. I don't think this is a particularly good cover, but I am happy, at least, that Bart has brown hair. Far too many artists decided he needed red hair once he became Kid Flash.

Our story picks up where we left off last issue with all our heroes falling out of the crashing T-jet. Last issue showed Bombshell flying and holding Cyborg, but in this issue, our creators remembered that she can't fly, so now she's riding on a bit of shrapnel with Static Shock, while Beast Boy has turned from a fire-breathing dragon into an enormous condor to carry Cyborg. Blue Beetle is carrying Aquagirl, Superboy is carrying Kid Flash, and Wonder Girl is carrying Miss Martian, who still seems injured after the fiery fight with Holocaust.

Anyway, the important matter, over the Missouri plains, is that the dimensional rift has closed up right after the fat man took Raven through it. Beast Boy begins shouting that they need to find her, but Superboy displays a cooler head, saying they need to regroup and come up with a plan. Kon and Bart also are the only two who decide it might be a good idea to catch the T-jet before it crashes into the ground. Bart cushions its descent with a whirlwind and Kon grabs hold of the plane's nose before it hits the ground. Cyborg examines the damage and says they should be able to patch things up well enough to get them back to San Francisco. Beast Boy doesn't want to leave, but Static points out that Raven is now in another dimension. He also identifies Raven's kidnapper as the Wyld.

So our team patches up the jet, with Bart cooling off the freshly melted metal. They quickly make it back to San Francisco, but Cyborg immediately takes off on another jet to New York, saying he's going to help look for Raven from his lab. He also cryptically says it'll be just like he's here, watching his former teammates' backs. Our heroes make their way into the tower, but they hear someone in the east corridor. Believing this to be a burglar, Wonder Girl tells Bombshell to protect the injured Miss Martian, while she, Kon and Bart put on very serious, angry faces.

But it turns out the "burglar" was just two scientists from Cadmus, sent there by Cyborg. Bombshell is understandably upset that Cyborg didn't tell them about this, but Kon can at least vouch for one of the scientists, remembering her from his old Cadmus days. Beast Boy immediately asks them to get to work on finding Raven, but Wonder Girl says they also need to figure out what's wrong with Miss Martian. So the scientists split up and Wonder Girl tells everyone to get some rest, noting these two projects are going to take a while.

So, everybody just settles in. Bart takes a shower and emerges, wearing only a towel, to talk to Kon about his confusing relationship with Cassie. Bart suggests simply asking Cassie what's going on, but Kon says if she doesn't want to be with him, then she should just say so. Jaime Reyes asks Virgil Hawkins if he'd like to go get something to eat, but when Jaime sees Virgil talking to his mom on the phone, he suddenly gets homesick. In the infirmary, Dr. Rochelle Barnes tells Cassie that Miss Martian is suffering from a kind of neural degeneration she's never seen before, although she's hopeful M'gann will be able to recover with some rest. Barnes' husband, Dr. Vincent Barnes, tells Beast Boy that even though he's isolated the Wyld's extradimensional energy signature, actually tracking that signature to another dimension is like trying to find a needle in a thousand haystacks.

That night, Cassie visits Kon in his room. She begins talking about how hard it is being the leader of the Teen Titans, so he suddenly stands up and gives her a kiss. He asks, "That make it better?" Cassie responds, "No ... make it harder." I don't know if she meant to say "makes it harder" or if she was asking him to ... uh, kiss her harder. In any case, this steamy scene is suddenly interrupted by Rochelle reporting that Miss Martian is now awake.

Everybody runs down to see her, and they're all surprised to learn that Miss Martian doesn't remember Raven being kidnapped. Curiously, though, M'gann does seem to know that Vincent is looking for the Wyld in the wrong way. M'gann advises Vincent to check for ley lines — veins of mystical power that run through the body of existence. This helps Vincent make a minor breakthrough, and he optimistically says this will shorten his search time from several months to just a few weeks or even days.

Virgil visits Jaime's room to take him up on his offer for dinner, but he finds Jaime packing his things. Blue Beetle admits he's pretty rattled after the fight with Holocaust and is not too keen about traveling to another dimension to find Raven. So he's going home. Virgil is supportive of Jaime's decision and casually saunters down to the gym to find someone who also wants to get Chinese food. He finds Bombshell, who agrees to eat with him and discuss the confusing predicament of Miss Martian.

Kon reports back to Bart about his interrupted kiss with Cassie, and Bart tells him not to worry, noting that Cassie is hot and "carries around her own rope," so they'll get together again. Right on cue, Cassie walks through the door and is suddenly furious again. She pulls Kon out in the hall and lays into him, saying the team's never going to respect her as a leader with Kon sharing her business like that. Kon apologizes, but Cassie angrily says, "And that helps me how?"

Naturally, this doesn't go over well with Kon and he promptly flies off into the night. Aquagirl sees this and decides to tell the first person she sees — Bart, who is currently raiding the Titans fridge. Bart says Superboy always leaves fast, and that things between Kon and Cassie are "complicated." Bart adds that he's complicated, too, but 100% available. But Aquagirl is too disgusted by Bart's enormous appetite to feel any attraction toward him.

Back in the lab, Rochelle has joined her husband, while Beast Boy continues to obnoxiously hover over them. Bombshell checks on Miss Martian, who has fallen back asleep. Amy says she doesn't completely trust M'gann for reasons she can't fully explain. M'gann suddenly wakes up again, saying she had a nightmare, but it wasn't her dream — it was the Wyld's. Amy goes to Cassie's room to tell her this latest development, hypothesizing that M'gann has become some kind of transmitter, relating intel without even knowing it. Amy also reports that Superboy flew away last night (which means we've suddenly jumped ahead to the next day). Cassie darkly says that Conner is in a position to act as impulsively as he likes.

We get a quick glimpse of Conner flying high up in the atmosphere, telling himself not quit letting Cassie mess with his head. Back in the lab, the professors make another small breakthrough, saying they've narrowed down their "thousand haystacks" to just 10 haystacks. But the overtaxed equipment somehow literally catches on fire. Inexplicably, Beast Boy turns into a chimpanzee and offers to repair the machinery, provided the professors talk him through it.

Meanwhile, Superboy returns to the tower, stopping by the outdoor pool, where Aquagirl is swimming laps. He asks for an update on Miss Martian and Raven, and relates with Aquagirl's drive to go swimming (or flying) to be alone and think. For some reason, this observation makes both of them laugh, which does not look too good for Cassie, who's spying on them from the monitor room.

Meanwhile, Static Shock suddenly got an idea of how he can help, and he tells the doctors to hook him up to their equipment to give it a power boost. So they put Static in a sort of electric chair, which somehow, someway, boosts the computer's power levels by 400%. Later, everybody gathers in the conference room to hear the doctors' report. Apparently, they have isolated the dimension where Raven was taken, but in order to get to and from that dimension, they need to access a corresponding vibrational coefficient, in what is essentially the dimension's keyhole. The keyhole lies at the bottom of the ocean, deep in a trench with pressures too extreme for any sea craft. The door to the dimension is on a deserted island, which may be littered with old Russian nukes. Bart optimistically says this sounds like a piece of cake.

Naturally, Aquagirl is the best pick to swim to the keyhole to open the breach. The doctors do warn, however, that every time the Wyld has entered this dimension, it has activated extradimensional energies that have likely mutated nearby sea creatures. This means that Aquagirl's task of opening the keyhole to allow the search party to go through the door and reopening it to bring them back has just become more dangerous. Also, the doctors add that in the other dimension, the Wyld is likely to have god-like powers, meaning the search party needs to be pretty powerful.

So Wonder Girl tells Bombshell to go with Aquagirl to the keyhole, noting her armored skin should protect her from the ocean's pressure. Everybody else will be on the search party, except for Blue Beetle because Jaime didn't answer his phone when Cassie tried calling him. Miss Martian is up and about now, but says she'll stay home, worrying that she's no longer trustworthy. Cassie agrees, and then insanely says that she can feel the Wyld worming around in her brain, and that her presence would put them all in jeopardy, but she can show everybody what they're up against. Cassie then has everybody hold hands as she leads them in a kind of psychic seance to show them the Wyld. (I'm 99% sure Miss Martian was supposed to be saying those last few lines — not Cassie.)

Anyway, the Wyld's story began on another dimension that looked a lot like the African savanna. One day, Raven passed through on a search for her father, but in her distressed state, she inadvertently left behind a residue of aggressive extradimensional energy. Somehow, this energy fused a bunch of random animals together, creating the Wyld. Cassie (or Miss Martian) explains that only the energy that created the Wyld — i.e., Raven — can destroy it. She also says the Wyld was weakened by being in this dimension, so it returned home to regain its full strength and devour Raven to become powerful enough to destroy the Earth. Cassie then vows that they will not allow the Wyld to accomplish its goal and courageously shouts, "Titans together!"




What a mess. First, the Cassie/M'gann thing. It makes absolutely no sense for Cassie to suddenly have a psychic link with the Wyld, let alone have the ability to share this vision with the rest of the team. Part of the problem was letterer Travis Lanham didn't separate some of Cassie's lines from M'gann's, making it all one big, nonsensical dialogue from Cassie. The other part of the problem was penciller José Luís drew M'gann to look exactly like Cassie. Same hairstyle, same face shape, same tank top (everyone wears a tank top in this issue, by the way — kinda annoying). So when colorist Marcelo Maiolo came in, he couldn't tell who was supposed to be who. And we ended up with a very confusing and frustrating ending that was supposed to be the big explanation to set up our next adventure. Sadly, I have to put a lot of the blame for this on editor Rachel Gluckstern. We've seen her before on this blog, and unfortunately, she hasn't been associated with the best comics.

As for the rest of the story, it was just short of an incoherent mess. The pacing is out of control, with so many quick jumps in between scenes. And all of a sudden somebody refers to "last night." When was last night? How long have you guys been chilling in your rooms? How come Cassie had to be told that Superboy flew away? How come nobody made a big deal of Blue Beetle leaving the team? Why didn't Cyborg simply tell the team he'd asked two scientists to help them out? And, seriously, what is going on with Cassie? She has become completely unbearable.

As for Bart? Well, I'm glad that he and Superboy have so far proven themselves two of the more experienced members out in the field. They were invaluable in the fight against Holocaust, and they were the only ones who thought to save the T-jet from crashing into the ground. Life in the tower will take some getting used to for them. It's fitting that Bart is the only one Kon can turn to for advice with Cassie (even if talking to an undressed Bart was slightly awkward). And I kind of liked seeing Bart eating a large amount of food. Comics rarely mention the fact that speedsters need to eat a lot, and they show it even less.

All in all, this was a rough and frustrating read, leaving me with way too many questions. And I'm not talking about the mysteries of Raven and Miss Martian. I'm talking about the basic logistics of the organization of the team right now. Geoff Johns neatly set up the Teen Titans as a weekend-only club for our young heroes. Is that what's happening now? Does this whole issue just take place over the weekend? Will Bart go back home (wherever that is) after Raven is found? Or does he just live at the tower permanently now? Sadly, I suspect these questions will never be answered.

The new backup feature is called Coven of Three, and it has nothing to do with Bart, so we'll skip it. Next: Let the battle begin!